Tiffany Green and her husband were the picture perfect couple: smart, attractive and, by all intents and purposes, the quintessential couple. Even, their families adored each other. Theirs should have been the ultimate happily ever after story! Yet after 3 1/2 years of marriage, Tiffany called it quits. Up until this point, she had never failed at anything but here she was with a failed marriage and had no idea how to overcome this failure! This third episode in our Recovering From Divorce Series chronicles Tiffany's journey to the real answers she was seeking and the real resolution her soul required.
In this episode, Tiffany shares:
- The false reality of success
- How she overcame the shame and guilt of failure
- One of the worst things you can do when someone is going through a divorce
- The importance of embracing the loneliness instead of trying to avoid it
- What her divorce taught her about herself
Things that made us go hmmm
“I needed to go through this feeling of loneliness to get back to the feeling of being okay.”
“You realize God loves you more than this marriage, right?”
“People normally shame [others] when they feel like there's a loophole that they're missing.”
“But when you have done all the work - and you have owned your narrative, and you take out the shame, and the anger and the guilt, and whatever else you're holding on to - nothing you say to anyone or nothing that they say to you can really, like, take you out.”
“So many of us stay in relationships too long, not because we don't know necessarily that it’s toxic, but because of the shame.”
“When you're married, you're so busy giving out that you don't realize the person that's been waiting for you to pay attention is you."
“I'm kind of struggling with calling it [divorce] a failure. Because look at who you've become as a result.”
About Tiffany Green
Tiffany is a native of New Haven, Connecticut. She earned a Bachelor’s degree from the University of Connecticut and a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology at Howard University in Washington DC. After graduating from Howard University, she joined the First-Year Success Center team at the University of New Haven where she was a counselor helping first-year college students adjust to the rigors of college. After 5 years at the University of New Haven, she took a job with Achievement First Amistad High School in New Haven. She now works at an amazing project and place-based high school called, Think Global School (TGS), as a school counselor. TGS takes students to 12 countries over a 3-year high school career to learn experientially, engage in community service and experience the various cultures encountered firsthand.
Sometimes life hits you up side your head and leaves you dazed and confused, and those who love you most can’t understand. Sadly, that happens all too often. At those times, the only thing you have is an inner knowing, an inner knowing that there’s got to be something better out there for you. That’s enough though for your Inner Guide is always wise. If you dare to stay the path, it’ll give you what you need to overcome your current circumstance and be better on the other side.
What were your aha moments? We'd love to hear them!
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